Living for Others
Based on my Rosh Hashanah Sermon I, 5783
A student of the saintly Rabbi Israel Meir Kagan Z”L known today as the Chofetz Chaim was asked to go to small town near Radin to lead services and offer words of inspiration for the High Holidays. He did not want to leave his rabbi for the holidays and politely declined.
When word reached the Chofetz Chaim that he had turned down going to the other city to help with the holidays, he called him to his office and said, “A Jew doesn't live for themselves.”
As we begin the New Year of 5783 we see a world full of tumult. We are still enduring the impact of the unprecedented pandemic which took so many dear lives. COVID continues to wreak havoc on people's health and welfare.
We have an economic system which has been severely shaken and inflation has hit everybody. The war in Ukraine that Russia is waging continues to bring cruel violence upon innocent people and threatens to destabilize an entire continent. We see a rise in ultranationalism which has brought a predictable rise in antisemitism.
Due to all of these troubles one might think that we are incapable of making a difference. After all, none of us have the power to change the economy by ourselves, to heal everybody who is sick, to end the war and bloodshed in Ukraine in another places, or to end antisemitism.
So when faced with this challenging world, I think of the words of the Chofetz Chaim -“A Jew doesn't live for themselves.”
This lesson, while given by a rabbi to his student, is an ecumenical teaching with universal applications.
We don’t live for ourselves.
One of the most potent antidotes to what we are experiencing and seeing in the world is for each one of us to make doing something for someone else a regular part of our lives.
Maybe it's bringing in the groceries for an elderly person, maybe it's volunteering to babysit or making a monthly donation to those in need. Maybe it’s helping a person redo their resume or helping someone get a job at your company. Asking people, “can I help you with this?”
(My advice is to start with smaller more specific acts of kindness. From there, work your way into bigger things. It’s not always “easy” to help someone else, and sometimes it may be thankless. We are not doing these acts for the “thanks” involved or notoriety, but for elevating our lives and the lives of others.)
We can face the emotional and spiritual challenges of the world today and know that we are making a difference by doing a favor for someone else.
Because we don’t live for ourselves, we live for others.
This does not mean that we neglect to take care of our spiritual and emotional health, God forbid. That is a Divine imperative for each one of us. It’s like breathing - we have no choice but to do that. At the same time, I do know that sometimes we can get caught up in our own issues and that itself might bring a person down.
Maybe you are facing some kind of enormous test or challenge and feel incapable of overcoming it?
Do something for someone else.
When we do that act of goodness for another we transform our world and their world. It opens up possibilities and blessings from the Highest places.
This past year when Russia invaded Ukraine, Rachel and I felt helpless. Millions of people being displaced, hundreds of thousands of Jews fleeing for their lives and we are sitting in California watching it unfold on the news. We felt powerless and terrible and I could not sleep at night.
God put an idea into our head — maybe we could help with Passover for refugees who have fled to Poland. With one text to the Polish Chief Rabbi, we found a mission. The Jews from Ukraine who were in Lublin didn't have anyone to help them make Passover. They needed supplies and help to organize the Seders.
Without knowing where we would get the resources or how we would do it we said yes. Emphatically yes. We announced through emails and online what we were going to do, and more than one hundred people contributed to our fund to help make Passover for Jewish refugees and members the community in Lublin. Every single person who contributed had a part in that Mitzvah.
(I wrote a few articles about what transpired which you can read here.)
The experience brought home to us the message again. We don’t live for ourselves, we live for others. When we embark on a mission to help others we also gain a powerful advocate - God is there to help us make it happen. Every time that we set out to do a Chesed project, a project to help others, we see what some call serendipity, and I call Divine Providence.
Each one of us in 5783 have the ability and will have the opportunity to do something for someone else.
As the great Polish Tzaddik, Rabbi Kalonymus Kalman Shapira, the Piaseczno Rebbe said, “the greatest thing in the world is to do someone a favor.”
May God grant us all a healthy and sweet year. May we find many opportunities to help others! In the merit of that goodness that we help bring to the world, may we tip the scales of Heavenly judgment in our favor, to bring about a complete salvation and redemption of the world.
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